Holding My Hand

I shuffle the cards,
and fly the low ones across the room
and what I have left lets me color you an angel
I hold my hand of souvenirs for dear life
to Remember
some lovely little things

first kisses and street lights
shiny skin and blue night
touching boyish strong arms, hard stomach
tracing the line down your back
swimming in the dysfunction
is awfully fine
because at least it's accepting and sincere
your excited smile and mischievous look
mulch in my hair and scared stomach
you made me feel

it's a shame...
like how my leg fit perfectly in the crook of yours
you remembered my pain, even though you didn't have to
you were standing so close I could feel the heat of your body
put your arm around me
slow nervous breath on the back of my neck
breathing me in.
Pulling me in. One hand on my waist.

I'm always with you.
I would be honored.
I still love you. You. You.
and you and you.