The Brattychick

I was at a bar with Michelle. David came in and said hi, that he was surprised to see me and that he was waiting for my dad and brother. Then he went and stood nearby,  but not with us. Then Thomas came in. He was loud and very happy to see David. I felt angry that they hadn't told me they were in town. Thomas said something to David like "it's good to see you,  man. I really wanted to catch up with you while I was in town." I turned around and said,  "Hi Thomas." And he looked surprised and confused,  wondering if I'd been invited or if I just happened to be there. And I said something like,  "Imagine! Running into your sister, at a bar in the city that she lives when you were just trying to catch up with the rest of your family!" Thomas rolled his eyes and looked pissed off. I introduced them to Michelle briefly and they hugged her awkwardly. Thomas and David went to another part of the bar because they didn't want to hang out with me...

Cole : Lady Gaga's clothes are so weird. Heidi: I know. She's like a walking piece of museum. Cole: But she's like that dive museum . Heidi: That museum wasn't a dive. You're just used to the Smithsonian. Cole: But it was all naked people. Heidi: No it wasn't. Jamie : I like naked people. Cole: Yeah, but there's only so much you can do with naked people. Heidi: You can do plenty with naked people. You're just not old enough yet. [My brothers, who are home from college, squirm as we crack up.] Heidi: Man, you've been away from home too long. Jamie: Embrace the awkward. scandalized at the Weatherspoon Art Museum in Greensboro, NC

Thomas , David, & Melanie were raving about the movie Where the Wild Things Are . So last night I went to the movies all by myself, for the first time ever, I think. For those of you that are not familiar, Where the Wild Things Are is a well loved children's picture book by Maurice Sendak. The book is certainly less than 100 words long, and so Max and The Wild Things are not given their full personalities by literature alone. The pictures, and what your imagination does with them, fill in the gaps and reach places that words cannot. I was really curious as to how writers Spike Jonze and David Eggers were going to go about stretching this short book into a movie. Especially a book that wasn't theirs. Not one of The Wild Things in the book says anything that isn't in unison with the other Wild Things. I would be terrified to expand on a character that was another writer's vision with only illustrations to go by. And they had to create several in addition to fleshing...

In high school no one needed sleep. I could go knock on a friend's window any time of the night and they would get up and party with me. Then everyone gets old and responsible and they're all "I need my eight hours." Except I still frequently stay up all night. Last night I was up until 4 am. I'm not saying that my thirty year old body doesn't hate me for it the next day. Also, I'm not able to rally like I used to. I had Cole when I was 18 and all the older biddies said "Now sleep when the baby sleeps, honey." But I was young and pretty used to four hours of sleep. I couldn't understand the fatigue that all the other new mom's were complaining about. By the time Miles and especially Dexter came along, I understood. But when I do stay up all night, I find myself alone in my endeavor. Jamie occasionally will be irresponsible, but he is infrequently up past midnight. A quick walk around my neighborhood at 9 pm shows the depressing si...

I am so lost right now. Nothing in my life seems right. The religion I was raised on seems wrong for me, but yet, nothing else seems quite right. So maybe there is nothingness after this. Which would suck. Because my kids and brothers are so freaking cool. If they are snuffed like a candle and are forgotten in a hundred years it would be a travesty. That is actually a serious understatement. There isn't a word for how sad that would be. And also because this life has been damn weird, and I keep waiting for it to get right. But I only catch fleeting glimpses of good. But perhaps that's how it is for everyone. Also, it seems like everything I've ever gotten, was won by default. I'm drowning. And I am a lone misfit. Too weird for the island of misfit toys, even. It seems like people were a mistake. We're too damn smart. Monkeys aren't freaking out because they haven't found balance and meaning. It'd been better if I were a monkey. Then I wouldn't have t...

Dexter : What's Lemony's real name? Heidi: Who? Dexter: Lemony. Heidi: I don't know anyone named Lemony. Dexter: You know. David's girlfriend. Heidi: Melanie ? Dexter: Oh. Yeah. Melony. What's her real name? Heidi: It's Melanie. Dexter: Oh! I didn't know you could be named Melony.

Which obscure holiday was I born on? a) Earth Day b) Cinco De Mayo c) Labor Day d) Memorial Day e) Arbor Day Where was I born? a) Washington DC b) Virginia c) Nepal d) California e) Tennessee How many siblings do I have? a) 10 total. 6 halves, 4 steps. b) 3 brothers. c) 2 brothers and a sister. d) 6 total. 5 halves. 1 step. e) 2 brothers I was almost named..... a) Chrysanthemum b) Tammy c) Venus d) Kelly e) Sapphire How old was I when I went on my first date? a) 9. I was totally boy crazy starting in 4th grade b) 14. We went to a church dance in our Sunday best c) 13. And I had to sneak out to do it d) 12. My mother trailed us all over the mall e) 16. I wasn't allowed out of the house until then Which (school approved) extra curricular activities did I participate in? a) Choir and Sports Medicine b) Band and Track c) Debate Team and Cheerleading d) Drama and Dance Team e) Junior Republicans and Lacrosse I've known my b...

Whilst pointing the remote at David... "I'm going to push subtitles because sometimes you say really weird words I can't understand.

Balderdash is the best board game around. There are 5 categories. Words . An obscure word. Each player must come up with a made up definition for the word. Movies . An obscure movie title. Each player must come up with a synopsis of the movie. Laws . The beginning of a weird law, such as "In Canada it is illegal to dance..." each player completes the sentence. Names . A lesser known name of someone who did something semi-important. The player must fabricate a semi-important thing that this person did. Acronyms . The player must decide what this acronym stands for. The rest of the rules are inconsequential to the comedic value of this blog, so if you really want to know, go buy the game. We love this game so much that we have ventured out to target on two separate occasions to purchase it when bored on vacation. Some of the answers are so funny that I've kept the little pieces of paper in the box for years. Should I put them in a scrapbook? NO! Instead I will blog them and...

2/18/2008 From age 5-18 I lived in a little gray house in McLean, Virginia. We moved there almost exactly 24 years ago after my mom and dad married. The house was old, but roomy. It was a corner lot with a huge yard. There was a plum tree, three crabapple trees, an apple tree, 2 evergreens, at least 4 dogwoods, and plenty of other trees I can’t name. I climbed all the climbable trees. The evergreen in the back wasn’t climbable because it had thorny leaves, but it was so large that the branches made a canopy that you could go under and be alone. There was a little hill near the house in the front. At night if you stood at the top of the hill, you could see the buildings in Tysons Corner. Sometimes when we came home at night I used to run over there and wish I were doing something exciting over there with all the lights. There was a large area along the side yard where there weren’t any trees. There was a patch of wildflowers that grew there. There were white and sometimes purple clover...

I have now been tagged thrice ( Jennifer , Jeramie , Kelly) for this little exercise, so I suppose it's time to do it. I'm struggling to think of things that I haven't already written about, especially since I did something similar to this a while back, but here goes. I usually care more for people than they do for me. This is hard to swallow. I would probably be a lot more devastated if you died then you would be if the tables were turned. So you can rest assured that when you think no one cares, that I love you to pieces. Part of it has to do with... ...the fact that I have an incredible memory. I remember a lot more than most people do about each relationship, no matter how insignificant it was. Ask me what I remember about you. You'll be surprised. Sometimes I can even remember conversations verbatim. I am very candid and forthright. I do have some things that are secrets from most people, but I have told all of my secrets to at least one person. Just not the sam...

Top 10 Important Things (Good, Bad and Ugly): Increased spirituality as a person and as a family. A close second is that my relationship with my Dad became much stronger than it ever was, an unexpected benefit of lots of working and lunching together. Worst episode of depression ever ...gained 10 pounds, horrible wisdom teeth extraction (see below), broken washer. Still struggling. All three boys are making huge strides in areas that are hard for them, and were all placed with excellent teachers. Cole and Miles started new schools. I am the Parent Of A Middle-Schooler. I learned to like animals. Jamie said we can get a dog if the house gets cleaned, so the house is cleaner. 10 year anniversary . The "State of Our Union" improved. Halloween at Disney. Thomas left for college and never spoke to me again. David made the cut at DePaul's Acting Conservatory , seems happier....and brought us Melanie !!! Who I love. America pleasantly surprised me. Minorities and women ca...

Cole : Do you have a quarter for the jukebox? Heidi: No. Cole: Does Thomas or David? Heidi: No. None of us have any change or cash. We only have credit cards. We are trust fund babies and housewives. David: Mmmmm...Feels good!

David: This was our spring play. I played the only white guy in the show. Jamie : Way to go, Token.

Heidi: Did you hear that Lily Allen is pregnant with someone else's baby? David: What do you mean someone else's? Heidi: Not yours. David: Oh yeah!

I have absolutely no recollection of writing the pinstriped underwear blog. I think maybe I was under the influence of a sedative or two. When I checked myspace this morning it completely took me by surprise. My brother, David, was angry that I chose to blog the Ian McKellan conversation because he is an actor and therefore feels that he should have been aware of Sir McKellan's gayness, so Thomas gallantly said "You can give David credit for knowing since he needs to feel smarter in this one." I fell down my stairs on Friday evening and sprained my ankle badly. I thought it might have been broken for an hour or so. I am clumsy. Here's a picture. Feel sorry for me internet.

David: Ian McKellen is gay? Thomas : You didn't know this? Heidi: I don't even know who that is. Thomas: He's Gandalf and Magneto. Heidi: [blink, blink] Thomas: You don't know this? David: Obviously not since I just said! Thomas: He's the bad guy in X-Men and the wizard in Lord of the Rings. Heidi: Wait, isn't he like 900 pounds, I mean 900 years old? David: Yes. Heidi: Do people allow you to be gay if you are 900 years old? Thomas: Yeah, you're allowed to be but I don't know if you can practice. Jamie : By that time you don't need any more practice.

I've never let you all know how little I care for sports. I care even less for watching said sports on TV. Fortunately for all of humankind I married someone who feels roughly the same, at least the spectating part. Suffice it to say that you will never find sports on our TV. Unless it is the bass fishing that Jamie watches occasionally, and believe me, that little thing came out of the woodwork after I vowed to love him for better or worse. The Super Bowl is our token sporting event that we watch each year. Since we know nothing about sports whatsoever, we use a scientific process to determine who we will root for. This year we based our decision to root for the Bears solely on the fact that my brother, David, is in Chicago for the next few days auditioning for an acting conservatory. During the boring time in between commercial breaks, I typically go in the kitchen to make finger foods for us to munch. Jamie always yells at the TV just like he's supposed to. This always mak...