The Brattychick

Whenever I feel sad,  I remind myself that I live on a lake right now. At this moment in my life, I have this simple luxury of living on a body of water that the majority of people (even very rich people!) do not. I likely won't have it forever. I can see a huge expanse of lake from my kitchen window! Right now I am sitting on my lake facing patio, reading a book about a like minded girl, drinking a cup of coffee, holding my sleeping happy newborn baby,  with my doggy at my feet. Life is perfect in this moment.

Cole: (pointing at whiteboard) Ipad sign up 4:20! Heidi: What? Cole: Ipad sign up 4:20! Heidi: Ugh. Why are you in high school? Cole: I don't know. Heidi: Stop saying that.

I'm depressed again. Maybe it's the weather. I'm finding myself dragging through days. I'm having to pep talk myself out of a nap and hurl internal abuse at myself for the stupid procrastination that keeps happening. My oldest son just turned 16. If he leaves for college when he is 18, I have less than 2 years to finish training him to be a functional adult and a thoughtful roommate. I want my children to feel empowered and capable. I spent the weekend refining their adult skills: cooking, baking, buying textbooks online, organizing a closet, using bleach. I wanted to provide a nice life for them. I'm still in college and by the time I am able to provide a better life for them, they will be gone. That makes me so sad. I feel like I'm 19 again. I'm living just the way I did then, except this time there are 3 children in my tiny apartment, stretching my tiny budget. I wanted them to have better. I wanted to do better for them. And what of the rest of my li...

Miles (looking at those stick figure car stickers ): We need to get some of those people! Heidi : What? You can't just go and GET people, Miles. Cole : Unless you're in Syria 200 years ago or something. Heidi : Well, yeah...that, or you just go make people. Cole : Ooh, cool, I want to go make a person... Heidi : Noo. It's not time.

"You've got to stop poking the orifices on your face with chopsticks, ok?"

StepfordHater: Where have you been? Heidi: i've been around why? StepfordHater: Haven't seen you in ages, not even running into you at TJ. Miss you. I can't believe Cole is 13. Heidi: sigh i know yikes i hate tj not the school I just have a phobia of other parents StepfordHater: I like talking to people. But sometimes it just makes me feel like a freak. Heidi: I fear that I am being judged although I may not be but I don't believe myself when myself tries to talk reason StepfordHater: Pfft. I think we can safely say that most of the time we ARE being judged. Heidi: Oh good! You think I am being judged too? So myself is not as crazy as myself previously thought? Or at least yourself is AS crazy as myself StepfordHater: lol. Silly. I think I'm being judged. But yeah, I'm sure you're being judged too. And statement #3 is my choice Heidi: awesome Also I am judging them but don't tell anyone While they talk Elmo and potty training with th...

"You're letting all the boys in your room without asking."

"Ok, take your fingers out of the holes in your face."

Heidi: Hey Dexy. How was the day? Dexter: Fine Heidi: Did you have some trouble today? Dexter: Did I? Heidi: I'm asking you. Dexter: No....Did I? Heidi: Well Ms. R said that you had to go to the office today. Dexter: Oh yeah. But I wasn't in trouble. I just had to go to the office because I wasn't working well with my friends. But I didn't have to see the principal or anything. Heidi: What did you have to do? Dexter: I just had to do my work at the office because I wasn't working well with my friends. Heidi: Oh. Dexter: And it was really fun! I saw Mor Mor there!

Cole (3/5/98) is the first-born child to Jamie and Heidi. His parents were young when they had him. His father was 23 and his mother was 18. His parents met in 1995 at their workplace, Langley Electronics and Camera. Jamie worked in the front of the store, helping customers and selling electronics, and Heidi worked behind the scenes in the photo lab. They were friends for two years before they became romantically involved. Although both his parents wanted a boy, they opted not to find out if the baby was a boy or a girl. However, blue was Heidi's favorite color and everything that she purchased for the baby was blue. This dismayed her mother, who thought the baby was a girl. During her pregnancy, Heidi worked at two different photo labs and then did temp work at an auto dealership. At the time of Cole's birth and through his babyhood, Jamie was working as a web developer in a company he started with his mother and step-father. The couple had great trouble agreeing upon nam...

Mexico Heidi was relaxed and happy and laughed all the livelong day. Unfortch, DC Heidi is surly and bitchy and cynical most of the time. I was tagged by RedSneaks to list 10 things that make me happy. This is probably a very good, albeit difficult, exercise for February, since February almost always makes me wanna stick my head in an oven. My family. A very close friend recently was giving me the 30 second synopsis of why she had issues with her dad. She ended it by saying, "My dad is the person that I love more than anything in the world, and also the person I hate more than anything in the world." I am so in love with my family, but they reduce me to tears more often than I'm willing to publicly admit. Hip bones. When I lie on my back and my two hip bones stick out and they make this little empty space where my belly is concave and my underwear goes straight across. I'm in love with that. Performing. In any capacity anywhere. I even love auditioning. I do not l...

Cole is off at a friends house, Miles is out with his Daddy , Dexy and I made an igloo...just like Max .

Heidi: you were eavesdropping! Miles : I have ears! Heidi: Well stop using them!

Heidi: If you haven't started your evening routine in five minutes, you're going straight to bed...without supper. Dex : We already had supper. Miles : But that was the last supper. [ Jamie gives Miles a look.] Miles: What? Jesus joke. And on a related note (but a completely different group of people) for your viewing pleasure, a budget rendition of the last supper. We had to let some of the disciples go because of these tough economic times, so we're short eight or so. We also hadn't much to eat but ketchup and Guinness. Thomas , Heidi, Chris , Shawn, Nikki

to Dexter ... "If you don't do what I asked, I am going to blog that thing you just did."

To Cole ... "Why didn't you eat your dessert first? What kind of kid are you?" Lest ye should wonder, this is not under Things I Never Thought I Would Say because I would totally say this.

In response to Dexter telling Miles to stop being an idiot... "Well you can't just stop being an idiot, you know."

cute lingerie karaoke ADHD is the biggest health issue facing my family anti-depressants and Ritalin my kids love to read so much that I have to go in their rooms after "lights out" and confiscate books art in all it's forms we have enough money to buy the things we need technology, especially google analytics, facebook, blogs, and online shopping and pizza delivery I know how to make really good food everyone that lives in my house is funny

This is technically the first episode of SPASM (Stupid Prattle After Sleeping Meds) because in the first episode , I only got to the explanation of what SPASM would be and the reason behind it and then I fell asleep. So that was not very weird or random. So what shall I talk about? Should I tell you that I am so behind on life in general that I haven't really thoroughly checked my kids backpacks in days? That this makes me feel like a slacker-mom? That it seems like parents have to be way more up in their kid's biz-nazz than they did back in my day? Then again, that doesn't seem like a very fun topic. What about the fact that I buried my fishy today? Or that my seminary teacher died last week and I am devastated? No. No. No. I will save that for more coherent times. Dang, I can only think of depressing subjects right now. Hmmmm...Here's something cheerful: Today the guy from the repair shop where I was getting my car fixed said I needed to come pick up the car and dri...

Jamie : We should pull over and let them out to run around. Heidi: And drive away?