The Brattychick

I was at a bar with Michelle. David came in and said hi, that he was surprised to see me and that he was waiting for my dad and brother. Then he went and stood nearby,  but not with us. Then Thomas came in. He was loud and very happy to see David. I felt angry that they hadn't told me they were in town. Thomas said something to David like "it's good to see you,  man. I really wanted to catch up with you while I was in town." I turned around and said,  "Hi Thomas." And he looked surprised and confused,  wondering if I'd been invited or if I just happened to be there. And I said something like,  "Imagine! Running into your sister, at a bar in the city that she lives when you were just trying to catch up with the rest of your family!" Thomas rolled his eyes and looked pissed off. I introduced them to Michelle briefly and they hugged her awkwardly. Thomas and David went to another part of the bar because they didn't want to hang out with me...

"I'm going to put clothes on now because there are people in my room."

"I fill up the tub and then read a play because I'm an old woman."

"Your car is clean...what is this?"

Heidi: If you haven't started your evening routine in five minutes, you're going straight to bed...without supper. Dex : We already had supper. Miles : But that was the last supper. [ Jamie gives Miles a look.] Miles: What? Jesus joke. And on a related note (but a completely different group of people) for your viewing pleasure, a budget rendition of the last supper. We had to let some of the disciples go because of these tough economic times, so we're short eight or so. We also hadn't much to eat but ketchup and Guinness. Thomas , Heidi, Chris , Shawn, Nikki

"You were once the best sperm."

Cole : Lady Gaga's clothes are so weird. Heidi: I know. She's like a walking piece of museum. Cole: But she's like that dive museum . Heidi: That museum wasn't a dive. You're just used to the Smithsonian. Cole: But it was all naked people. Heidi: No it wasn't. Jamie : I like naked people. Cole: Yeah, but there's only so much you can do with naked people. Heidi: You can do plenty with naked people. You're just not old enough yet. [My brothers, who are home from college, squirm as we crack up.] Heidi: Man, you've been away from home too long. Jamie: Embrace the awkward. scandalized at the Weatherspoon Art Museum in Greensboro, NC

"I have something to tell you. The South, I'm pretty sure, is not going to rise again."

Thomas , David, & Melanie were raving about the movie Where the Wild Things Are . So last night I went to the movies all by myself, for the first time ever, I think. For those of you that are not familiar, Where the Wild Things Are is a well loved children's picture book by Maurice Sendak. The book is certainly less than 100 words long, and so Max and The Wild Things are not given their full personalities by literature alone. The pictures, and what your imagination does with them, fill in the gaps and reach places that words cannot. I was really curious as to how writers Spike Jonze and David Eggers were going to go about stretching this short book into a movie. Especially a book that wasn't theirs. Not one of The Wild Things in the book says anything that isn't in unison with the other Wild Things. I would be terrified to expand on a character that was another writer's vision with only illustrations to go by. And they had to create several in addition to fleshing...

This is simply to settle a dispute between Thomas and me. I win.

In high school no one needed sleep. I could go knock on a friend's window any time of the night and they would get up and party with me. Then everyone gets old and responsible and they're all "I need my eight hours." Except I still frequently stay up all night. Last night I was up until 4 am. I'm not saying that my thirty year old body doesn't hate me for it the next day. Also, I'm not able to rally like I used to. I had Cole when I was 18 and all the older biddies said "Now sleep when the baby sleeps, honey." But I was young and pretty used to four hours of sleep. I couldn't understand the fatigue that all the other new mom's were complaining about. By the time Miles and especially Dexter came along, I understood. But when I do stay up all night, I find myself alone in my endeavor. Jamie occasionally will be irresponsible, but he is infrequently up past midnight. A quick walk around my neighborhood at 9 pm shows the depressing si...

Thomas : Virginia lost to Georgia in the World Series. Jamie : The Little League World Series? Thomas: Yes. Jamie: So? Thomas: We care about that, right? Jamie: Why would you tell us bad news? Thomas: Well, we did well. Jamie: Why wouldn't you just tell us if we won? Thomas: We made it to the super regionals. Jamie: But you're like 'There's a sport that you didn't know about, and we lost .'

I am so lost right now. Nothing in my life seems right. The religion I was raised on seems wrong for me, but yet, nothing else seems quite right. So maybe there is nothingness after this. Which would suck. Because my kids and brothers are so freaking cool. If they are snuffed like a candle and are forgotten in a hundred years it would be a travesty. That is actually a serious understatement. There isn't a word for how sad that would be. And also because this life has been damn weird, and I keep waiting for it to get right. But I only catch fleeting glimpses of good. But perhaps that's how it is for everyone. Also, it seems like everything I've ever gotten, was won by default. I'm drowning. And I am a lone misfit. Too weird for the island of misfit toys, even. It seems like people were a mistake. We're too damn smart. Monkeys aren't freaking out because they haven't found balance and meaning. It'd been better if I were a monkey. Then I wouldn't have t...

Heidi: Are you in a men's choir again this year? Thomas : No. Heidi: SATB? Thomas: Yeah. Jamie : What's SATB? Heidi: You don't know what SATB is? Jamie: Sexy Ass...Titty Bang?

Heidi: What were we just talking about? Thomas : Bestiality. Heidi: No, before that...Statutory rape, RUM!

"I'm not asking you as a friend, I'm asking you as a filter!" Because I have none, as you well know. This was a question I asked after asking whether blogging a particular conversation would be in poor taste. The answer was yes.

"The early bird catches the worm, but the late owl gets to lick the beaters."

Thomas : [Whilst drawing in the sand] We should make communism! Heidi: Um, ok. How do we make that? Do we all get crabs and shag each other? Thomas: [laughing] Uh, yeah. I think that is how we do that. Heidi: Or maybe it's the reverse. Thomas: I was just going to make it with a crescent moon and a sickle, but I think your way is more realistic. Heidi: We're gonna need some tofu.

"...and my stomach was like 'there's a whole chicken in here and you're riding a bumpy bus'"

"I'm really behind the bag on this one. I let the cat out of the eight ball."