Great Quotes 002

"What's all this?"
-George Banks from Mary Poppins

I don't know why but this quote cracks me the freak up. You probably don't feel the same way, but since when has my blog been about you? Unless you are, like, anybody I know. In any case, I've decided to incorporate this phrase into my vocab.

If you care to listen to a blast from your childhood:

New Years' Resolutions 2009

1. Finish moving my blog from Myspace to here.


2. Blog 157 times


3. Lose weight


4. Get out of debt


5. Do 365 things that make me happy by the end of the year. Rules: Said thing must last at least 15 minutes and TV shows and video games don't count.


6. Work on my degree.


7. Improve my marriage and family by doing specific things.


8. Get the house cleaned up to my satisfaction and not anyone else's stupid-over-the-top yuppie standard.


9. Improve spirituality.


10. Ask for help 12 times.

And just for giggles, my resolutions and results from last year:

1. Blog every day. Not even close. I screwed this one up the second week.


2. Get skinnier. Gained 10 pounds.


3. Get the f-ing house clean. The house is much cleaner, but still not clean enough.


4. Start taking classes again after a year hiatus. This sort of happened, but the issue that took place wasn't my fault, so I am giving myself credit for this one.


5. Perform in some capacity each month. Nein.


6. Cut back on eating meat and cheese. Cheese is delicious.


7. Do things that make me happy. I did ok with this at times, but made up for it in spades by wallowing in sadness at other times. I have reason though. However, other people have better reasons and they aren't wallowing.

Yeah, so anyway, don't take me too seriously, fellas. I've got a bad track record.

25 Random Things About Me

I have now been tagged thrice (Jennifer, Jeramie, Kelly) for this little exercise, so I suppose it's time to do it. I'm struggling to think of things that I haven't already written about, especially since I did something similar to this a while back, but here goes.

1. I usually care more for people than they do for me. This is hard to swallow. I would probably be a lot more devastated if you died then you would be if the tables were turned. So you can rest assured that when you think no one cares, that I love you to pieces. Part of it has to do with...


2. ...the fact that I have an incredible memory. I remember a lot more than most people do about each relationship, no matter how insignificant it was. Ask me what I remember about you. You'll be surprised. Sometimes I can even remember conversations verbatim.


3. I am very candid and forthright. I do have some things that are secrets from most people, but I have told all of my secrets to at least one person. Just not the same person. This is probably not a good idea? I have no idea.


4. I eat when I am bored and stressed. I am always bored or stressed. I am stressed when the kids are up and I am bored when they're in bed. I think I am finally finding better things to do so that I don't blow up like a balloon.


5. I love performing. Public speaking doesn't frighten me.


6. I think songs that talk about girls being really mean to boys are funny, even if they are supposed to be sad.


7. I am a perfectionist, but my house looks like a tornado hit it?


8. I have a mean streak that I have to keep an eye on all the time.


9. Please don't touch my collar bone, armpit or Achilles tendon because it grosses me out.


10. I can sing, play the guitar, and sort of play the piano. I played the violin briefly in elementary school and hated it.


11. I am Mormon and have never made the trek to Mecca (Utah). In fact the only middle states I've really been to are Ohio and Indiana. Those don't count though, I think.


12. I have no attention span whatsoever. I hate the dentist because I have to sit still for so long. It is SO boring.


13. I am currently confused about what my long term goals are.


14. I think boys typically make better friends than girls. However, it gets complicated after one or both of you gets married. This makes me sad.


15. I was placed in a "juvenile facility" for 21 days when I was 17.


16. I am a good cook, and I love food. I taught myself.


17. Aside from spending my first year in California and another brief stint there senior year, I have lived in Northern Virginia my entire life.


18. I PROCRASTINATE EVERYTHING. Except for confrontation.


19. Today is my friend Jon's birthday. I haven't talked to him in years. We used to be inseparable, but I don't even know how to get a hold of him now. It doesn't really matter though, because he could easily find me if he wanted, but he doesn't (see #1). I hear he is going to Iraq soon, and I fear I won't ever see him again.


20. Aside from the U.S. I've been to Germany, France, Iceland, and Mexico. The first 3 were on the same trip.


21. I would like a slower pace of life, but I don't know how to do that.


22. My wedding cake was blue. Weird, huh?


23. I have been in 4 plays in the last 7 years. All musicals. It's a lot considering the thousand children I have.


24. Worst years of my life: 9, 19, 29. I should've seen it coming.


25. I throw things away and my family digs them out of the trash.

Oh, and I am supposed to tag 25 people to do this on their blog or myspace or facebook or whatev so...

1. Jamie, because it would be a good exercise for him, but he will probably never know because he doesn't read what I write anyway.


2. David, because I miss him.


3. Thomas, ditto


4. Keith, because I'd like to hear about his quirkiness of late.


5. Sean, ditto.


6. Rob, because I find him interesting.


7. Liz, because she understands me.


8. Kristina, because I think she may know all things.


9. Vin, ditto


10. Shawn, because it will be funny.


11. Ben, ditto


12. Dad, because it might be hard for him.


13. Ali, because I wonder about that girl.


14. Alison, because we live parallel lives.


15. Robin, because I love her.


16. Nikki, because I think she might love this crap.


17. Hillary, because I want to know the real Hills.


18. Raphaele, because I wonder how she's doing.


19. Danielle, because I worry and wonder what she is up to.


20. Dan, because he's got some interesting random things.


21. Jonathan, because he is so private.


22. Susan, because I miss her phone calls.


23. Megan, because I wonder what she's been up to.


24. Rodrigo, because he is mysterious.


25. Robin, because I am curious.

It's Funny Because It's True 003

Nikki: This traffic is ridiculous. I think we should relocate the office to [my mom's] house.

Heidi: I'm not coming unless there are tortilla chips.

Nikki: Heidi's so fickle, but all it takes is tortilla chips.

Dad: Yup. Give her chips and salsa and she'll follow you anywhere.

Inauguration

This is Dexter reading our Control Tower, which lists our daily events.

"Good Morning! Today is Tuesday, January 20. We'll watch the inauguration of our first African American President today. Hooray! This is history in the making. You will remember this day for the rest of your lives! Burgers for dinner."

Great Quotes 001

"Fools aren't born, Pongo, pretty girls make them in their spare time."
-Roger

101 Dalmations

No Sleep Til Brooklyn

1:49 AM

Heidi: Wait, are you going to bed?

Jamie: Yeah.

Heidi: quitter.

It's Not Nice To Take People's Balls

My church has an informal basketball team. A friend asked me to come to practice and somehow I forgot how much I hate sports. Nothing strikes The Fear into me like team sports. A lot of it has to do with gym class.

The competitive boys in gym class were horrible and ruined sports for me. They would scream at you any time you made a mistake. The worst was Brooks Hunt. I don't know what was wrong with that kid, but he was purely hateful. He couldn't stand to lose, and would have a screaming tantrum any time a girl didn't execute something according to his standard. I can't take the screaming for something I didn't even mean to do. Ms. Ronemus was our elementary school P.E. teacher and Brooks lived in her back pocket. I don't ever remember him getting reprimanded for his constant loud verbal abuse. Somehow that boy ended up in my gym class almost every year of my life from 4th grade on. Usually when he did his screaming I would completely ignore him, even though it upset me. I typically wouldn't even look at him and that somehow enraged him all the more. There was at least one instance where I cried though. I remember it because it was in elementary school and I walked out of the gym, which was just not done in elementary school. I still have dreams about Brooks Hunt. It's so aggravating,.

I decided I wasn't an athlete. I never played a team sport. It's my Most Terrifying Thing.

I must have forgotten that I'd decided that. I don't know what I was thinking, but when I tried it tonight it was sheer panic the entire time. It's overwhelming and there's too much to pay attention to and I am likely to make a really bad mistake. It's so much pressure.

Sports are so weird. It's like some freaky role playing game. Your friends are suddenly all business. Their serious concentrated faces and odd bodily conduct would be hilarious if it I weren't engaged in something so terrifying. They're all up in your grill. I can't break out of myself to play along. I just look at them and politely say, "Please go away." Judging by how that went over, I guess you can't play basketball that way. If you take my social skills away I am at a loss. I'm not used to going up to people and knocking things out of their hands. I mean, I don't want to take someone's ball away from them. That's just rude. I also don't want to flail my arms around in their face, or almost knock them over to try to get somewhere. People were touching me in some sort of weird sporty aggressive way. I'm already awkward enough without flailing and running into people and falling ungracefully. Oh and the falling is a whole 'nother level of scary. Cause there was this one time I fell and I broke my femur.

In team sports there are too many things to pay attention to in a split second. If everyone would walk instead of run, I might have enough time to think. My girl, Robin, says it gets easier the more you practice. But then you have to practice, and it all gives me The Fear. It is all such a foreign odd scenario for me.

So tonight I eventually freaked out and just said, "I can't do this." Internet, it was so embarrassing. Now they all know I am even weirder than they suspected. I was actually fighting tears.. Ugh. There's no crying in ladies church basketball practice-the all time least stressful sports environment ever. I am a giant pansy. I'm so glad I didn't cry (until I got home) because that is the ridiculous.

I can only assume that team sports affect me the same way public speaking effects most people. I love public speaking. Why can't I be normal and cry over public speaking? Then you would all understand.

Everyone knows you're supposed to do the thing that gives you The Fear so that you can overcome it. But guys, I really don't wanna.

The Nature of Men

I've just had a sad epiphany. All of my children are boys. Judging from my brothers and my husband, what that means is that after years of loving them above all else and devoting every minute of the day to their care and happiness, they will grow up and I will hardly ever hear from them again. So why am I doing this? Go call your mother.

Jamie Says 004

"For a second her face was a hat. HATFACE! What a hatface weirdo!"

Cheese Is Delicious

Heidi: Cheese is delicious.

Thomas: I know. Don't you wish your whole body was made of cheese?

Heidi: No. Because then I would, like, eat my hand.

Thomas: I know! It would be great!

Heidi: No it wouldn't! I need that thing.

Thomas: Oh, cheese grows back!

Movin' On Up

Dear MySpace,

I am breaking up with your blogging feature. I hope this isn’t a shock. I’ve given you warning. Your code is a mess and I always have to clean it up. I can’t find anything. When I am trying to find all my favorite Dexter Says I have to search through page by page! I mean you don’t even have a search box. I’ve moving somewhere more organized and better looking. With a search box, even.

Love,
Heidi

Follow me:
thebrattychick.blogspot.com
You'll have to copy paste that because myspace is a piece of poopooing and won't let me link to outside sites.

Subscription link is on the upper right hand side.

Top 10 for 2008

Top 10 Important Things (Good, Bad and Ugly):

1. Increased spirituality as a person and as a family.
   
2. A close second is that my relationship with my Dad became much stronger than it ever was, an unexpected benefit of lots of working and lunching together.
   
3. Worst episode of depression ever...gained 10 pounds, horrible wisdom teeth extraction (see below), broken washer. Still struggling.
   
   
   
   
   
4. All three boys are making huge strides in areas that are hard for them, and were all placed with excellent teachers. Cole and Miles started new schools. I am the Parent Of A Middle-Schooler.
   
   
   
   
   
5. I learned to like animals. Jamie said we can get a dog if the house gets cleaned, so the house is cleaner.
   
   
   
   
   
6. 10 year anniversary. The "State of Our Union" improved.
   
7. Halloween at Disney.
   
   
   
   
   
8. Thomas left for college and never spoke to me again.
   
9. David made the cut at DePaul's Acting Conservatory, seems happier....and brought us Melanie!!! Who I love.
   
   
   
   
   
10. America pleasantly surprised me. Minorities and women can be considered for and elected to major leadership positions. We're not as closed-minded as I feared.